Seat 19D, E and F, all for the supposed tall guy. Thank you, stewardess smiling seductively. My knees and head are forever grateful.

Sitting somewhere above the clouds, beside the engine. Another flight, another country left behind. Closing the door to a life that could have been, opening an other.

I peek to the side. The tiny window provides a grand view. Different altitude, different angle, same continent.

Reminiscing. Tired at the time of writing this. Eager to trade this Latin American life for the serenity of where I come from. Missing those three people that resemble my ‘home’. Those whose smile is never feigned.

Wanting, yet choosing not to. Not yet. Too obsessed with attempting to cause a fatal wound to this thing called mediocrity. Too busy battling procrastination. That pocket sized enemy with its apps and notifications.

These dreams of mine are too far from being achievements. And, quite frankly, stopping halfway on this road to happiness is not an option. Returning to what and where I was is unacceptable.

That life on welfare is dead and gone. Buried, cremated, chained to a ball of lead and resting on the bottom of the ocean. Mutilated to such an extent that its reincarnation isn’t even negotiable.

What a powerful thing. Having a prognosis so despicable to you that you have no other option but to succeed to avoid it.

I quit the staring and grab my phone. I scroll through the photos of my holy trinity. A smile on my face, a heart that’s heavy.

Goosebumps. A moment of sentimentality on this flight. It must be the overkill of medication polluting my bloodstream. The overkill that simultaneously provides my face with this calm expression.

I loosen up the seatbelt and lean against the window. A grown man, resolving things himself. Feelings and words get shared with the mirror and this piece of paper. Knowing it is a lonely hike up this road called life every now and then, but worth it.

A final glance at a family picture, a kiss on the valuable gift that’s wrapped around my wrist.

Thoughts stop. I zone out. Shut eye on the red eye.

Be sure to follow: www.instagram.com/campdky

Check out @campdky on TikTok.

Buy the book at: https://www.amazon.com/Vic-Koopmans-ebook/dp/B0B6TC4WX9/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?crid=GWSYPFYSYYSU&keywords=vic+koopmans+head+first&qid=1658281167&sprefix=vic+koopmans+headfirst%2Caps%2C127&sr=8-